“Don’t let anybody demean you just because you are different size or shape. Everybody has equal rights to be happy, to wear clothes which they want. Most importantly, love the fact that you are a plus-size woman and it is not a disease or a crime but a way of happiness.”Pallavi Madhav
What Stops Our Happiness
“Tu kitni moti hai, Tujhse shadi kaun karega, Isko khana thoda kam diya kro, Aur ladkiyo ko to dekh, Madam aapki size ke kapde ni hai.” This is the story of millions of girls who try to fit themselves in stereotypical size (36-24-36). Since their childhood, women are taught about the parameters of beauty and it becomes necessary for their happiness.
Have you seen any woman who is satisfied with the size and shape of her body? obviously not, but why? have you ever wondered about it? gradually, complaining leads to self-hatred and becomes the cause of anxiety and depression that ruins happiness.
An Inspiring Jouney of a Plus Size Girl
Pallavi Madhav, a Freelance plus-size model and a Body Positivity Influencer overtly talks about her depression and anxiety due to extra flesh on her body. She was bullied thousands of times for not looking like other girls.
She always has been a chubby girl and diva of her colony as her clothes used to be designed by her designer aunt. She was never bothered about her physical appearance but her growth as an obese girl changed people’s perspectives towards her. Her life as a happy girl began to impact due to others’ judgements.
College is about wonderful memories to cherish forever but what happened when it is turned into nightmares? For Pallavi, the college was a place where she was bullied the most for being plus- size girl.
“I was sent to the best college in the city with the most beautiful divas around. Those three years in the college have been life-changing because then I realized what being bullied is and being fat is as equal as a crime.”
She gives herself immense pain through dieting, gym, aerobics, swimming and every other possible way to lose weight to fit in the ideal size of the body and to hear the word ‘beautiful’ and ‘sexy’ than ‘cute’ and ‘chubby’.
“You should put her in a bouncer job after her college or maybe as a Sumo wrestler. It seems the best career option for her, one of my relatives says.”
The journey from Self-Hatred to Self-Acceptance-Key of Happiness
Continuous incidents of body- shaming, Pallavi decides to love herself and to accept the way she is. That day, she closes all the doors of other’s judgement and accepts herself beautiful. Therefore, her journey of self-love takes her towards the career of Plus-Size model. Now, she influences other women who demean themselves and make them understand “Kuch to log kahenge, logo ka kaam hai Kahna.”
Pallavi Madhav’s journey from self-hatred to self- acceptance is inspiring. Her experiences are a collective one as every woman experiences body shaming. My conversation with her made me realized that the key to happiness is within us. Happiness comes from loving ourselves and accepting the way we are not how were are portrayed through others.